Matt Walsh on Parenting

Sometimes I like Matt Walsh, sometimes I don't. But today I think he hit the nail on the head when it comes to parenting. Thanks for the tip, Ashlee!

(click below)

I don’t agree with your parenting choices. Now let me explain how you should raise your own children.

My favorite quote: "As far as I can tell, from my own .000000001 percent experience, there is only one “strategy” that absolutely every parent in the world ought to adopt: love your children. Love them. Strive to do what is best for them. This, this I will insist is the “right” way for all parents to parent. "

I hope I never give the impression that I am telling you how to raise your family. I only want to empower moms (and dads) to stick with it, do their best, and love themselves during the journey of parenthood. Go you! 

School Lunch - Made Easy

It's October and school is in full swing.  Getting bored of making school lunches yet?  My friend Ashlee submitted this awesome link about making school lunches more fun and more convenient:

lunch box cheat sheet

I love it!  Even though I don't have school-aged kids yet, I still use this cheat sheet from time to time.  I included the list here...

lunch box cheat sheet

Tips

• Place a frozen juice box in your kids’ lunchbox. – it’ll keep the food chilled and will be thawed by lunchtime.
• Go for variety. Make sandwiches using whole grain tortillas, bagels or pitas.
• Pack antibacterial wet wipes so your kids can clean their hands before and after eating.
• Add grated veggies to sandwiches and wraps for crunch – your kids won’t notice they’re eating something that’s good for them!
• Use small resealable bags to pack dressings. Kids can open one corner and simply squeeze onto salad, then discard.
• Get dipping! Pack salsa, hummus, yogurt or salad dressing for your little ones to dunk their sandwich, veggies or fruit into.
• Make bite-sized and mini versions of regular foods like sandwiches. They work well for small appetites and are more likely to be eaten.
• Add a quick note to say good luck on a test or “I love you” – it will brighten your child’s day.

This is a great list.  Looking back, now I know why mom my mom used to put a frozen juice box and ranch dressing in my lunch.  I loved how my drink turned into a slushy, and dipping my carrots in ranch dressing made me feel pretty cool.

Did you know that kids LIKE hummus?  It's so healthy!  I can get my toddler to eat so many vegetables as longs as I have hummus around (and if we run out of veggies, we eat the hummus with a spoon).  My favorite hummus recipe is this:


Easy Blender Hummus

1 can garbanzo beans (save liquid)

1 clove garlic

2 tsp cumin

1-2 Tbs peanut butter

splash of lemon juice (optional)

Put all ingredients in a blender and turn it on low.  While blending, slowly add saved liquid into the blender until you reach the desired consistency (I use about 2/3 of the liquid).  Serve with bell peppers, carrots, cucumbers, pita chips, cauliflower etc.  


Speaking from personal experience, I love the convenience of disposable resealable bags.  For $2, you can get 100 tidy sandwich bags that can be used for so many things!  I like to put partially used food items (like onions, bananas, avocados etc) in the bags and stick them in the fridge.  Then I re-use the bag if it's still good later.  I'm all about cheap convenience.

Another tip I recently started using (and I'm probably the last mom in the world to try this one) is frozen Go-Gurt.  It turns into a delicious push-up popsicle!  Yeah, it's not the most healthy snack, but it's a perfect treat for a toddler who doesn't know the difference between ice cream and frozen yogurt :)

Be sure to browse the rest of the kraft.com website!  There are lots of ideas about healthy and easy lunch ideas.  Another little gem is this page:

cooking skills by age

Some days you just want your kids out of the kitchen.  But other times it can be enriching to let your kids "help out" a little bit.  And I bet that your kids will remember those special moments when you let them have the extra freedom, even if it means a bit more work for you.  In fact, here is a list of easy recipes your kids will enjoy making and eating:

kids can cook

One last tip.  We recently had to clear out one of our cabinets for a new dishwasher.  Well, the dishwasher didn't happen as punctually as we thought it would, so the empty cabinet naturally became a secret hideout for my 2-year-old.  And it's hilarious.  And it's convenient.  So when I need some space, I can send her to the secret hideout with a little snack and her favorite toy.  Works almost every time.  It has been so fun that I'm almost sad to install the dishwasher.  (Almost.  After all, it's a DISHWASHER.)  I think I'll just empty out a different cabinet so we don't lose the secret hideout when the dishwasher comes in next week :)

What are your favorite lunch time tricks?

Teaching Kids to Work

Submitted by Ashlee --

This is a chore chart we instituted several weeks ago in response to a truly horrible day.
I had reached a breaking point with uncooperative and lazy attitudes.

The chore chart works thusly: First thing in the morning I write down what chores need to be done. After breakfast the boys must accomplish their list of chores before any play. You will notice there are 3 boxes to check off. This is to address the particular problems we had been experiencing.
The first is to indicate that the chore just plain old got done... I always inspect their work to make sure that things were done properly.
The second is for staying on task (ie. I shouldn't have to tell you to "keep cleaning!" 20,000 times before the job is actually finished. I don't actually enjoy being a nag!)
The third box is for having a good attitude. Any whining, fighting, complaining, eye rolling, huffing or other like behavior is not permitted. You are part of a family. We all contribute to the cleanliness and happiness of this home.
If they get an "O," in any of their boxes I assign an additional chore so that they may try again.

Things have vastly improved since we started doing chores this way.
The boys are great little workers and their help has genuinely helped me keep the house cleaner. I give them chores that actually need to be done!
It's given me the chance to teach them loads of new and necessary skills and I have been surprised by what they are actually capable of accomplishing. They can sort laundry, clean all the different parts of a bathroom, pick up entire rooms, put dishes away, dust, wipe, organize... all kinds of things!
We genuinely have a good time working together each morning, and I am hopeful that they are learning good lessons like: Work before play, etc.

The system has been in place long enough now that it is simply an expectation. We have much, much less push-back when I tell them what they are doing, and they even seem to be proud of the job well done!

OTHER THINGS I HAVE FOUND THAT HAVE HELPED:
*** Listen to Music While you Clean.  It's the "Whistle While You Work," principle.  Everything is easier when you have a song to work to!  It makes the whole house feel different and happier.  I have a Pandora Station with Disney music that they like, CD's with Children's Music, or sometimes I just put on "Mom," Music - making sure I choose something uplifting and peppy.***

***Properly Teach your Children What you Expect.  Showing them how to properly get something done by modeling the chore first, and then staying with them as they do it themselves for the first few times alone is key.  They need to know exactly what is expected of them and how the job is to be done.  This helps prevent future arguing or having to go back and do something again.  It also shows that you care enough to spend time teaching them and helping them succeed.***

***Do Your Own Chores at the Same Time.  I like to be working in other areas of the house when my kids are doing a chore that they have mastered.  I think this shows them a few things.  First, that I trust them in their abilities to accomplish what I assigned.  Second, that I am not asking them to do something that I am not doing myself.  Third, it gives me the opportunity to show them that I enjoy working and getting things done.  I hope my example of working without complaining, enjoying the work, and enjoying my finished product will rub off on them.  How can I expect them to not complain if they see me complaining?***

***Think About What You Hope To Teach Before Setting the System.  You have seen how me and my husband set up our chore system... this may or may not be a good way for YOU to do it.  We had specific problems that we were trying to address and specific things we were trying to teach.  What YOUR goals are should determine how you do it in your home.  IE- Do you pay your children for their chores or not?  Do you set a specific time each day to clean or not?  Do you work all together as a team on one job or do you divide and conquer?... There are no "right," answers to these questions, it's all about what you are hoping to teach.***

***Praise Your Children and Thank Them for a Job Well Done.  Give a hug.  Say "Thank You."  Do a high five.  Admire and praise their work.  Play a game together afterwards.  Do SOMETHING to show them that you appreciate their efforts.  Children have the same needs as adults to feel accepted and appreciated!***

***Split up Bickering/Easily Distracted Kids.  This may sound simple but it took me a minute to figure out!  I have learned that for my 2 boys we are doomed from the get go if they are working together on a task.  They inevitably do one of 2 things: Fight about who is doing the work and who is slacking off.  OR... Forget the job altogether and play.  Having them work on separate tasks in different areas of our home sure helps!

***Stick with it Because IT MATTERS!  Some days no matter what tricks you pull out of your hat it just doesn't go well.  I know sometimes I think "This would be so much easier to just DO MYSELF!!!" But we can't stop.  I want my children to someday be responsible men and contributing fathers.  The only way they will learn is by consistency and love.  When I get tempted to quit I remember this quote by Julie B. Beck from her General Conference Talk "Mother's Who Know.":

"Mothers who know are nurturers. This is their special assignment and role under the plan of happiness.⁵ To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Therefore, mothers who know create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Homemaking includes cooking, washing clothes and dishes, and keeping an orderly home. Home is where women have the most power and influence; therefore, Latter-day Saint women should be the best homemakers in the world. Working beside children in homemaking tasks creates opportunities to teach and model qualities children should emulate. Nurturing mothers are knowledgeable, but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth. Growth happens best in a “house of order,” and women should pattern their homes after the Lord’s house (see D&C 109). Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women."

That's what it's all about!